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Building Trust with Yourself: The Foundation of a Full Life

In the fast-paced world we live in, it’s easy to lose sight of one of the most important elements of living a full life: trust. Trust is not just about believing in others; it’s about having faith in yourself.

Building trust with oneself is foundational for living a fulfilled and balanced life. It’s the bedrock upon which all other forms of trust are built, whether in personal relationships, professional settings, or community engagements. But what does it mean to build trust with yourself, and why is it so essential?

The Importance of Self-Trust

Trust is the belief in the reliability, truth, or ability of someone or something. When it comes to self-trust, it means believing in your own abilities, keeping promises to yourself, and valuing your own needs and goals. Trusting yourself is the real thing you need to build first before you can effectively trust others or be trusted by them.

Keeping Promises to Yourself

One of the most powerful ways to build self-trust is by keeping promises to yourself. Whether it’s a business goal or a personal aspiration, consistently following through on your commitments sends a strong message to yourself that you are reliable and worthy of trust. For instance, if you set a goal to read a certain number of books or to go to the gym regularly, sticking to these commitments, despite other pressures, strengthens your self-trust.

The Impact of Neglecting Personal Goals

Neglecting personal goals to take care of others or to meet external demands often sends a damaging message to yourself. It implies that your own needs and goals are less important than those of others, which can be detrimental to your overall well-being. This ongoing pattern of behavior can lead to a harmful cycle where you continually put yourself last.

Over time, this repeated self-neglect can erode your self-trust and self-worth, making it increasingly difficult to recognize and prioritize your own needs and aspirations.

Additionally, this mindset may affect your mental and emotional health, as constantly prioritizing others can lead to feelings of resentment, burnout, and inadequacy. It’s important to find a balance where you can care for others while also honoring and pursuing your own goals and needs.

Self-Care is Not Selfish

A common misconception is that taking care of yourself is selfish. However, self-care is important for your well-being and for effectively taking care of others.

Just like the airplane oxygen mask analogy—where you must put on your own mask before helping others—taking care of your own needs ensures that you are in a better position to help those around you. Filling your own cup gives you the strength, energy, and motivation to be there for others.

Taking care of yourself is important for your overall well-being and effectiveness in other areas of life. Being a role model for self-care can also set a positive example for those around you, showing them the importance of valuing oneself.

Balancing Personal and Professional Goals

Achieving a balance between personal and professional goals is essential for leading a full life. This balance is not about giving equal time to each aspect but about prioritizing what’s important at different times.

There will be seasons where personal goals take precedence and others where professional demands are higher. The key is to remain flexible and to ensure that neither aspect is permanently neglected.

Practical Tips for Maintaining Personal Goals

  • Schedule Self-Care: Just as you would schedule a meeting or a business task, schedule time for activities that bring you joy and fulfillment.
  • Be Flexible: Life happens, and sometimes you may need to adjust your plans. The important thing is to remain committed to your goals and find alternative ways to achieve them.
  • Gratitude and Self-Appreciation: Regularly take time to appreciate what you have accomplished. Gratitude is a powerful tool that fosters a positive mindset and reinforces self-trust.

Listen to the full episode of this Live Full Work Fun podcast where Fran Groesbeck and I kick off our four part building trust series.